It's Sunday...again. I don't know if it's the season, the weather, my upcoming doctor's appointment (which I'm kind of worried about), or just a particularly bad attitude for being awakened several times during the night by an over protective and very loud guard dog, but I find myself extremely apathetic. I don't care, don't wanna care, don't care if anyone else cares, just don't care. I thought about it yesterday when I couldn't drag my sorry butt out of my softy chair long enough to do anything constructive other than read. I'm living from day to day based solely on what I do at work.
Monday is relatively busy. First order of business is cleaning up the mess left from the weekend. How is it possible for a few "responsible" adults to make such a mess in two short days. It makes me angry that these people have no respect for "my space". It's probably very childish of me to feel this way, but it makes me angry to have to clean up after a bunch of adults who don't have the common courtesy to do it themselves. Anyway, the next order of business is to print out all the reports needed to cover weekend deliveries, salvage reports, recalls, transfers, etc. and deliver it to each department. Then I get to scan out all the salvage, board it up, wrap it up, and tag it to go out on the truck that night. Sue, the book lady comes in around noonish and puts out the books and magazines that arrived on Thursday the prevous week and I gear up to check out the returns when she's finished. I anticipate the truck arriving around 3:00 so have to get all boards ready to go out, find out how many are coming in, explain to a certain person at work in very small words what is going out, where everything is, what everything is, and try desperately not to choke the life out of her when all else fails! She is a nice person, but has to mini-micro-manage everything and everyone and makes Hitler look like a pansey! After the truck comes in, Monday is pretty much done. I go home, play with Bella, eat something, check mail, go to bed. Tuesday is easy. Go in, print reports, do salvage, scan out any books or magazines missed the day before (which isn't likely unless Sue didn't finish), then look busy for the rest of the day until the second truck of the week arrives. Wednesday...pretty much the same except I have to print the exception report and make sure all department have their copy and know what product outs to look for and adjust. Thursday is busy day again. It's double truck night so any salvage that has to go out needs to be scanned, toted, wrapped, and tagged. It's also books and magazines day which means I have to make room for approximately 8 shopping carts full of product as well as room for all the boards of stuff going out on the evening truck. Then, after lunch I check in numerous totes of books and magazines. Friday is my early day. I'm up at 4:00, at work by 5:30, clock in at 6:00. Friday is my transfer report day so I pick up all in-store transfers from other departments to log in the computer. Sue comes in today to put out the weekly magazines so I'll have a few to scan out. Other than that, UPS and Fed-X are the only other deliveries I'll have. And so ends my week. Ta Daaaaa!
Maybe my lack of ambition, for lack of a better word, is because I miss my children. Don't get me wrong here, I will not live with or closely to my children because ultimately we would end up killing each other, but I miss seeing my grandchildren...even though web cams are such a wonderful thing...it's not the same as getting that special hug and sloppy wet kisses. I miss that a lot. I miss being able to do something special when my granddaughter is one grade away from honor roll...I'm so proud of her. I miss my family. I don't get up as often as I'd like to see Jim and family, I don't get to see Bob and Linda nearly enough, I don't get to see Jean enough either. After so many years we are all so "close" and yet we are all so different and so wrapped up in our own lives that we've "lost" each other. I find that very sad. On the other hand, of course, since we are all so very different now we would probably kill each other after an hour or so.
Maybe I am depressed...although I can't understand why. I have so many things to be thankful for, so many blessings in my life, my friends and family, my constant companions, Bella and Mittens, I don't understand this feeling and I don't like it. I just can't seem to get around it for some reason. I think I'll dig out my glass to day and try to get my sorry butt motivated. I may even be able to go outside and get the insulation up on my windows. I have to do something other than hide inside myself.
Don't panic, it's probably just one of those "feel sorry for myself" kind of days and I had to vent to keep myself relatively sane. I'm going to find my glass and make myself busy. I'm not quite able to go outside yet, but maybe that will come later today. Go hug someone with your whole body...it makes you feel better. Love me
